Prize Turkey Of The Year 2023 - Only One Contender

Harry Windsor-Spencer

aka

Prince Harry The Duke of Sussex

H

His Dimness

Temper Boy

Sook

No Other Contenders - Just One Unequivocal Prize Turkey Of The Year 2019

Prince Andrew

Son of

The Queen of England

aka


Air Miles Andy
Duke of Pork
Randy Andy

2011 - A Whole Bunch Of Turkeys

Reflected Turkey: Jackie O

Homebrand Turkey TV Dinner :  Hamish & Andy's Gap Year - the lowest point in Australian television history.

Gang of Turkeys :  The Project ie All of Rove's friends who spray us with wet shit.

Turkey Starstruck :  Maylea Tinecheff (hands off our Ben).

No. 48 Turkey with No. 27 Frozen Chicken  :  Ricky Nixon and Tegan Gould

Turducken : Miranda, Orlando and Flynn.

Turkey with Added Hormones, Chemically Enhanced, Artificially Flavoured : Shane and Liz

Turkey Split : Heidi Klum and Seal - he just wanted to go out for a nice meal.

Humblest Turkey : News of the World Hack Rupert Murdoch.

Mini Turkey : Jack Vidgen.

Turkey Trial : DSK vs the Maid.

Turkey Surprise : Arnold Schwarzenegger's kid.

Non Kosher Turkey : John Galliano and his anti-Semitic Slurs.

Winner - Turkey Of The Year 2008

Last year's winning turkey comes from a very very tight field but never has the vote been so definite, our winner is the treacherous turkey, Baz Luhrmann. The gobbler tells New Zealand's Richard Wilkins that his movie is not about our land but about a state of mind. We are Australians but 'australia' plays no role in our cognitive awareness. And it seems many other Australians agree as we have been inundated with votes for Baz.

Turkey Of The Year 2008

And the nominees are........

Carved Turkey - Sam Newman - for his operating theatre performance featuring Turkey Spotter Eddie Maguire in a shower cap.

Turkey Spotter - Eddie Maguire - so proud of his (un)dressed turkey's 60 minutes.

Crack Turkey - Wayne Carey

Turkey Disney - Terri 'themepark' Irwin

Bad Turkey - Brendan Nelson on Sorry Day

Flaming Turkeys - Text Publishing, David Marr & Bill Henson

Treacherous Turkey - Baz Luhrmann

Turkey In The Headlights - Jodhi Meares

Dressed Turkey - Sarah Palin

Crumbed Turkey - Gordon Ramsay

And The Winner Is.................................

....................................................Peter Garrett

Turkey of the Year 2007..... & the Nominees are:

Turkey Fool - Simone Warne
Pretentious Sci-Fi Turkey - Jamie Packer and that fuckin' wedding.
Real-Life Turkey - Mark Philippoussis
Small Turkey Syndrome - John Howard
Turkey Chick - Bindi Irwin
"Clean" Turkey - Phil Jamieson on Enough Rope
Turkey For Sale - Peter Garrett

Winner - Turkey Of The Year 2006

Keith Urban wins Turkey Of The Year 2006 wings down!

All over the world, and in aircraft, people are asking for 'The Keith' - a Wild Turkey on Ice, in a tall, thin, frosted glass with a dash of ginger.



Keith Urban entering the rehab facility - note his womanly curves, in stark contrast to his 'wife's'.

Extra Turkey

Another nominee for Turkey of the Year has been brought to our attention:

TURKEY MALIBU WHOPPER WITH BACON: Mel Gibson - a racist, a drunk and NOT an Australian.

Turkey of The Year 2006

We have decided to post the nominations for Best Turkey in Show earlier this year as last time we were inundated with thousands of votes.

And the nominees are:

TURKEY DRUMSTICK: Heather Mills, for thinking she could come between a Beatle and his spliff.

TURKEY NECK: Madonna, for hanging herself on a crucifix.

FAKE TURKEY: Jamie Brooksby, for obtaining his Big Brother win by deception and for posing as a poet.

PICKLED TURKEY: Keith Urban, for marrying a man.

TURKEY BONES: Nicole Richie, for pretending she doesn't have an eating disorder, then admitting she has, then pretending she's overcome it.

TURKEY JERKY: russell crowe for using Steve Irwin's memorial to act.

BAD TURKEY: O.J Simpson, for thinking he could move a book about 'the killings'.

CHRISTMAS LUNCH: The guests at Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' wedding at Orsini Odescalchi Castle.

LOST TURKEY: Nicole Kidman, clearly a mixed up person.

TALKING TURKEY: Bono, for turning poverty into a brand.

PRIZE TURKEY: Tom Cruise, no explanation neccessary.

GLAZED TURKEYS: Kate Moss, Pete Doherty and Marcia Hines.

TURKEY SLAPPER: Axel Whitehead - ARIA flasher.

Cast your votes!!

Rich Turkey Stews

Eclipsing all other nominees, Mohammed al Fayed wins Turkey Of The Year.

Turkey Of The Year - Nominations - Cast Your Vote

For the first time in history we are opening up our blog for comments to collect votes for the inaugural Turkey Of The Year Award.

And the nominees are:

FRIED TURKEY(S): The Bali 9 for thinking that, in the climate of Schapelle Corby, they could get away with strapping heroin to their bodies and going through Indonesian Customs.

ROAST TURKEY: Donatella Versace

SLICED TURKEY: Mickey Rourke

NOT TURKEY (VEGETARIAN ALTERNATIVE): Gwyneth Paltow

TURKEY BASTER: Michael Jackson/Debbie Rowe (take your pick)

WILD TURKEY: James Hewitt for consenting to hypnosis for the purposes of reality TV.

BUSH TURKEY: George Bush

CHRISTMAS LUNCH: russell crowe

EIN TRUTHAHN: Prince Harry for bearing the swastika.

TURKEY BREAST: Vicky Beckham

TURKEY LOAF: Steve Vizard

COLD TURKEY: Joe Korp

FROZEN TURKEY: Nicole Kidman.......sooooooo creepy

TURKEY NUGGET: Charles Spencer Crowe

STUFFED TURKEY: Katie Holmes

TURKEY BY POPULAR DEMAND: Michelle Leslie

Vote now via comment or email.

Turkey Of The Year will be announced sometime in the New Year when we get back from Sir Elton's Wedding.

punkandblanket@yahoo.com.au