Friday, May 13, 2005

New Zealand's Megalomaniac Knows NO Boundaries

Will New Zealand's Russell Crowe ever stop?

His delusions of grandeur are triggering anxiety within us. If he is not medicated soon, we may have to resort to pharmaceuticals or voluntary admission to a psychiatric facility ourselves. Within the last two weeks we have had to brace ourselves before reading the morning's broadsheets, something we used to find relaxing. It appears nothing is sacred to this seemingly ubiquitous self-styled sage. We don't know if it's the birth of the plump Charlie Spencer Crowe or if Russell, following in the footsteps of Kung Fu's David Carradine, has become the Master and Commander, but NZ's Russ cannot stop giving advice. Whether it be the Prime Minister of Australia, the 3rd in line to the British Throne or parents around the globe, the Crowings are coming through thick and fast. Recent transgressions include:

DEMANDING the Australian government disregard the sovereignty of the nation of Indonesia and intervene in the Schapelle Corby matter.

BLABBING about his friendship with Prince Henry (Harry) to promote his solo album.

BANGING on and on about fatherhood and how great it is to be the Dad of the large-ish Charlie.

We used to admire the Kiwi's acting skills - he made a great Neo-Nazi - but now we are unable to separate the actor and the celebrity. Like anyone else we can suspend our disbelief, but the last Russell Crowe movie we saw found us contemplating which scenes Russell had rewritten.

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Charles Spencer Crowe at 3 months